First, sorry I was gone so long, but to paraphrase Justin Timberlake, “I’m bringing the Activismy back.” I’ve been recreating my pivotal role as Protestor #4 during the Seattle WTO Uprising in the movie, “The Battle in Seattle”; an acting performance that is certain to land me an Oscar for Best Performance by a Pre-Operative Transgender Actor. But don’t worry, when I’m hobnobbing with Babs, Sean Penn, George Clooney and Alec Baldwin, I won’t forget about you, the little people. And don’t worry, nothing’s going to change THIS girl, at least until we get an enlightened Progressive government that will finally pay for my gender reassignment surgery. But enough about me, my darlings.
I finally received the Books on Tape version of the “Iraq Study Group Report” and was able to listen to it while riding the bus to the “set” of my latest movie. There are some HUGE surprises inside. First, for those of you who don’t have Oscars, I will explain the background of this. The Iraq Study Group was commissioned by Aaron Spelling shortly before his death, and comprised of really concerned celebrities dedicated to bringing peace to the universe. In an attempt to get Bu$Hitler to listen to it when he had it read to him, it was chaired by the disgraced former ReiKKK-Wing Evangeli$t Jim BaKKKer, along with the $6 million dollar man Lee Majors, and tan guy George Hamilton. Also along for the ride were Lawrence Fishburne (and you wonder why Der Fuehrer is having him arrested for “tax evasion”, hah!), former New Kid on the Block Jordan Knight, little known soul-singer Edwin Starr, bald singer Sinead O’Connor, pianist Leon Russell, former footballer William “The Refrigerator” Perry, actor Rob Lowe, and noted intellectual Jessica Simpson.
Oh dear, I seem to be running out of time tonight… My curtain call is for 9:00 A.M. For my next movie I will have it spelled out that a star of my magnitude DOES NOT WORK BEFORE NOON (and that under protest)! So I will skip to the most GARGANTUNORMOUS surprise in the whole report:
After hearing reports on a daily basis for the last several years about the number of Iraqis killed that day, I naturally assumed that Iraq was a neighborhood in South Central Los Angeles. GUESS WHAT PEOPLE! Iraq is an entirely separate country that isn’t even inside the U$$A! This was a shock to me, even though many of you know that my 2 PhDs and 3 MAs are currently in the field of “Human Geography”, so I can imagine the shock that people like you with less than 2 PhDs (and 3 MAs), and no Oscars must be experiencing.
But do you realize the implications for the Chimpeachment of Bu$HitlerBurton? We all realized he had to go when we thought he had “only” invaded a sovereign NEIGHBORHOOD, but now, BUSH IS AN INTERNATIONAL WAR CRIMINAL!
I’ll see you all at The Hague.
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Bush IS Hitler 
OH MY DARWIN,this can’t be! You said a seperate country right? Oh my lucky red stars, I can’t even find this Iraq on a map! CONSPIRACY I SAY! I have seven Oscars BTW, all for my brilliant perfomance in Oliver Stone’s Nixon ( I was the war protestor sleeping on the stairs of the Lincoln Memorial).
NO BLOOD FOR STUDY GROUPS! THE WORLD IS WATCHING (BSNBC)!
Comment by Chairman M.S Punchenko December 12, 2006 @ 12:58 amYes, Chairman Punchenko, it is true! Iraq is a separate country, as shocking as that is!
But you have raised a far more important question. We must determine the Oscar to PhD ratio. For a final solution, I shall need to transfer my credits to the field of “Psycho-Mathematics”, but intuitively, based on speeches from Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon, I must estimate that each Oscar holds the power of 2 PhDs.
Comment by Speaks Truth to Chimps December 12, 2006 @ 1:31 amI was under the impression Bu$hitler Senior “annexed” Iraq in the early 90’s along with the Gaza Strip which he gave to the Zionists and Somalia which he planned to use as a springboard for a Mussolini-esque invasion of Ethiopia (I thank my Neo-Pagan Wicca Mother Earth Goddess for Premier Clinton (genuflect here) and his courageous withdrawl of the stormtroopers from there).
Wow! That’s quite possibly the coolest run-on sentence I ever wrote!
Comment by Comrade Che Cure Booty December 12, 2006 @ 9:53 amJust read in The Guardian where Israel is really the 51st state in AmeriKKKa. Figures, the Jooooooooos wanting their own state and all. I mean, who are these Israeli Jews to actually mar the Islamic landscape of the Middle East, particularly since they aren’t even a contiguous American state?
If the Jooooooos had any really compassion for the Arab people – who have admitted they can’t possibly bring themselves into the 21st Century because continual defeat at the hands of Zionist has so destroyed their confidence and self-esteem – they would line up and walk themselves into the sea.
I mean, who do these 6 millions Jooooooooos think they are keeping such a peaceful and industrious people like the Palestinians, Jordanians, Lebanese, Syrians, Egyptians, Iranians, Indonesians, Afghanis, Iraqis, Moroccans, Libyans … from the 21st Century? The arrogance of it all!
We must continue speaking truth to power … it’s all the Joooooooooos fault!
Comment by libmeister December 12, 2006 @ 11:13 amI never believed that the Joooos ate Christian babies. I think that Michael Moore eats all of Christendom, and cleans his teeth with Barbra’s nose.
And I’m waiting for my Oscar too because I waited an entire five seconds to throw up when Bushitler opened his mouth. You don’t know how hard it is to wait when you don’t have a brain which means you have lots of room in your head for thins which can’t be thought about because you don’t have a mind and so they just come out your mouth and if you can get them to your pen maybe with automatic writing you can win Best Screenplay at the Death March Festival in Skokie, IL
Comment by Theocritus December 17, 2006 @ 12:00 amI thought Rummy was the one on trial?
Comment by Damian G. December 17, 2006 @ 7:21 pmthere can be no truth, no reason… until the digg “free” thinkers weigh in… just wait… any moment now
http://digg.com/politics/Bush_IS_Hitler
Comment by Sagacious Himself December 22, 2006 @ 2:51 pmWhere’d you go, Speaks?
Comment by pastahero February 7, 2007 @ 5:02 amHere is a real good video to answer the question is Bush like Hiter
http://www.takebackthemedia.com/bushnonazi.htmlsh
jean
Comment by jean flournoy February 10, 2007 @ 11:33 pmDude. New song for you. Could be your theme song.
George Bush is Hitler
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Comment by Lecyclechielt September 7, 2007 @ 8:04 amHe coinage medal took a eye of the monarch toffee on the amplifier spiritualization fashionable to the teachers desk. We’ll coihage metal the wet sow to the path.
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Comment by usendasquak October 31, 2007 @ 8:17 pmWould you like to be an author on http://stopsecondholocaust.blogspot.com ?
All the best
Comment by naj November 3, 2007 @ 9:40 amTo some Bush is Hilter. He’s a really terrible Hitler, though. If he were really a good Hitler, he’d be rounding up millions of people he didn’t like, put them into camps and kill them. (Even FDR rounded up the Japanese.) People like Michael Moore would’ve had his fat ass shot to ragdolls after his 2nd movie came out. And Teddy Kennedy would get an ass-whuppin’ on general principles–for being an asshole for over 30 years. Teddy’ed dearly pray for that brutal Abu Grabh torture where he’d have to run around naked with soiled panties on his fat, alcoholic head. Then
Comment by John December 1, 2007 @ 4:42 pmBush ‘ed take over Europe and the Middle East and make soldiers march funny, like geese with a high-step. He’d nuke any country that got in his way. And he’d blame everything on another ethnic group–call ’em Demoncrats. The people–liberals and hippies–he didn’t kill he’d make work as slaves in bomb and tank factories til’ they starved to death. Bush’ed take over the radio and TV stations if he didn’t like what you said–like Chavez did in Venezuela. If you called him Hitler in public you’d be dead meat. And the men and boys would all have to wear dark blue suits and yellow ties, so they’d look like Bush, too. All the people who loudly crow and lament that they have no freedom of speech and live in a police state, well…they’d be right–if Bush were Hitler. They’d truly live in fear…for a short while anyway…until he killed them all…which would take him about ten minutes and a good cigar.
I would never pay for your mental flaws. The government does not need to pay for cosmetic surgery for people like you. You are a closet fag at best and dont need to but the blame of your feelings on others. I hate the government to but wont blame them for stuff they didnt do. I think your awnser does involve going under a knife but not to give you a penis but to cut your wrists so we tax payers dont have to pay for fags like you. Normal people will never except you in out society and that is another reason you should kill yourself and leave it. Your a auto immune disease of the human race.
Comment by sharon needles December 11, 2007 @ 2:45 pmRead the book, Bush on the Couch: Inside the Mind of the President by Justin A. Frank. This book is right on and should scare anyone. Bush = Hitler. Just look in his eyes. And right now, Bush is trying to remake his image and rewrite history, which is totally scary.
Comment by An INTELLIGENT Citizen May 20, 2008 @ 5:38 pmAM I ALONE? HAS ANYONE ELSE NOTICED HOW MUCH BUSH AND AcHmEdIneJihad look alike………the eyes have it…..
Comment by pjcurtin March 8, 2009 @ 11:22 amHow dare Bush depose the Islamo-Platonic “philosopher-king” Saddam, who was only waging a genocide against the Kurds and Marsh Arabs and Shi’a Arabs and Assyrians for the good of all of humankind! By preventing genocide, Bush is worse than a genocidal maniac! Makes perfect sense…
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